New leaf

So as you may have noticed I have not been blogging of late. This is because every time I got on, I didn't feel the urge to write. I finally realized today that the reason why is because I got bored with what I was writing. And if I was bored writing it, I am sure y'all were bored reading it. To fix this problem I have decided to add more of my thoughts to the blog and less of a play-by-play of my weeks. I think the first semester pretty much sums up what this PharmD life is like, nuts. There is no need to rehash the same tators over and over. So As I turn a new leaf I warn you now, you may hear things you do not like, or even better, things you do! I hope to make you think more about the actions you take in your life and how they effect everyone around you. I will not use this blog as a rant site, well maybe a tiny bit, but nothing belligerent or offensive. I hope to make you use the "squash" between those ears, and maybe make your small corner of the world a better place to live.

Getting started:

I will let you know that we have a CRAZY amount of tests coming up, nine in the next three weeks, so my blogs may not be consistent. The good news! We are almost done with our first professional year! Every week seems to have taken a month of my life, but flies by, if that makes since. I guess the emotional and physical toll far exceed the actual time spent in the week. I will not be surprised if I rock some gray hairs by the end of P2 year.

On to the new:

Today I was thinking about the past and figured it would be a good place to start for the revamped PharmD life. The thing about the past that infuriates us all is that it cannot be changed. This simple fact may sound elementary, but if you think about mistakes you have made, you will remember how much time you spent dwelling on what could have been if you would have been able to change that mistake. This leads to anger, depression, and even may cause you to miss a new and exciting opportunity that presents itself while you are being booty hurt. My advice to you, live by this simple maxim and you may be able to move on more quickly and enjoy life further. "There is no going back, the past cannot change, what's done is done, move on and do not make the same mistake again." Sounds easy enough, but in practice is not so easy. What I usually do is allow myself about a minute or two of intense rage, allowing all the angry, blame full and pointless thoughts run rampant in my head, or out loud if no one is around. I then take a couple deep breaths, and repeat the maxim to myself until I have calmed myself enough to move on. I do not forget the mistake I made, but accept it as done and make sure to take steps to avoid making the same one again.

By approaching the problem logically, you can devoid yourself of the emotions that may hinder you, and find the source of the problem and then better yourself. I do not advocate living a totally logic driven life, emotions are beneficial also, and are what defines us as a species. However, if we allow ourselves to be ruled by our emotions, we will continue the departure down a long and fruitless road.

Another thing about the past is the tendency to relive it and blame others fr their past shortcomings, and then letting that blame define you or them. Nobody is perfect, no government is perfect, no religion is perfect, no organization, school, team, club, or any other gathering of Homo sapiens. Why? Because of the common theme of these being comprised of humans. Humans are fallible and will always be so, this does not have to be bad thing, this is how we learn. It is the application, or lack thereof, that leads to "bad" things. We need to accept our and others mistakes, forgive them, forgive ourselves, and then move on. When we carry on, we use the knowledge we gained from the experience to live a better and more fulfilling life. The majority of our society has a problem with playing the blame game. "So and so did this, so I deserve this, or that is why I act like this, or that is why I need this." NO! Because someone made a mistake in your past, does not mean you deserve anything over another person. Having these kind of views is what leads to intolerance and violence. Accept what has happened, make sure you do not make the same mistake, and make your life and this planet a better place for it.

I am sick and tired of hearing people bitch and moan about something that happened in the past. No matter how much you complain, it will not CHANGE! Carry on. If we could all just do our parts, and not expect a handout, then we could fix a lot of problems with this world, and maybe even live longer, better lives because of it. The change starts with the individual, no person can make the entire world change by themselves, but if we all do our part to change ourselves, and not dwell on the past, than it WILL change the entire world. All we have to do is start.

Go time

I have been fairly lazy the past few weeks about school work. I have been studying but I have also been taking a lot of nights off. The death march is about to begin. I have four tests next week and two the week after. However, I am still not too worried. I don't know if it is the professors or the material, but it doesn't seem too difficult. I have been having slight panic attacks when I am away from my notes and I think about all the tests coming up, but then when I actually sit down with the material I don't feel too nervous about it. Hopefully this doesn't turn around and rape me. So the good news is that I have been able to spend some quality time with the wife. Probably the last bit of quality time that I will get with her until the summer.

Other than the tests coming up, pharmacy school has been pretty laid back. I did crank out a whole bunch of papers at the beginning of the semester, one of which was due last week, and I think this has made me a little more relaxed. I finished them way early and didn't have to pull an all nighter on Wednesday to finish it. I was planning on listening to all of my lectures again online, but I got too behind the first couple of weeks,(Mario Party) and I am unable to catch up. Hopefully that doesn't bite me in the ass either. I plan on being more studious and watching all the lectures as soon as this round of tests is over, but then again we make lots of good plans in pharmacy school that don't always work out.

Yesterday was the start of interviews for PharmD candidates! I volunteered to be there from 1-230 and ended up staying until 5. It was a lot of fun helping out the wee little babies! I can barely remember my interview, it was a blur of nervousness and regret, so it was fun watching them and wondering what I looked like to the students who were there for me. I had a good time sharing my experiences with them and giving them advice, even though they haven't even been accepted yet. I think the scariest thing about my interview and then acceptance, was all the not knowing. Of course as humans we are scared of the unknown and this was my entire future on the line. So I tried to tell them as much as I could and illuminate the darkness a little bit. Plus I want them to get accepted and remember me, and I will forget them and then that'll make me the most popular boy in school!!!!!! UMMMM... or not. That was a joke I swear!

On Tuesday Marie and I went to The Melting Pot and fondued the night away. It was an early Valentine's, because my first test of the semester is on V-day, thanks professor McGinity. It was amazing as always and I know Marie had an excellent time. Then the next night we went to a place called Painting With a Twist and we split a canvas and each painted a half of it. It actually turned out quite well, plus we got to drink some wine and hang out with Marie's friend and her boyfriend, who teaches there. Oh and get this, our art teachers last name was Hogan! That's the second Hogan we have encountered since moving here. The person who lived here before us was last name Hogan. It confused the Time Warner people pretty bad. Small world I guess.

Please ignore the stupid look on my face. We painted half and half, I think it came out really good!

I started this in the morning and am just now finishing it up. I therefore had a chance to go to work and become dumbfounded by the stupidity of people. In interest of saving time I will only bring up one instance, but it is something that happens often and is 100% preventable. A lady walks up to the pick-up counter. I say, "Hello, how may I help you?" Dumb lady, "Ummm.... yes... I am picking up my prescription." People say this all the time, not "I am picking up for..." or "My name is so and so and I am picking up." They tell me they're picking up their script, obviously, and then wait. For me to guess, or learn telepathy, I don't know what is passing through their minds. I cannot read minds! I see over a hundred people a day. Tell me your damn name!!!! Shit! So I sat there, because it pisses me off and I wanted to make her feel stupid, and she never offered her name. After about 45 seconds of my staring daggers at her, I finally asked her name. She didn't even sound embarrassed or was like "Oh, duh, you need my name." Nope, just gave me her name and continued to stare at the sign log. If I wouldn't have given in and asked I bet we'd still be there now. My trying to kill her with my mind, and her with nothing on her mind. Please tell the tech or pharmacist your name when you pick up scripts. Common sense eludes most people. Okay, that's all the biotching I'll do today.

I hope your week has been as fun filled as mine, I am sure next weekend I will be nice and depressed again, as pharmacy school wants me to be, but until then I am going to enjoy my time studying and hopefully get some shit done!